Thursday, January 03, 2013

Single Because...

So I go on twitter today and I see that for maybe the 2nd or 3rd day in a row #SingleBecause is a trending topic and honestly it amuses me a little. Its funny to read all these tweets of people justifying why they're single. I love most the "I'm single because I want to be." or "I'm perfectly happy being single". As a member of #TeamImSingle all I have to say is let's be honest people, those are BOLD FACE LIES. We are human, God or nature (whichever you prefer) has made us into creatures that group together. We are not completely fulfilled alone. That's why we have friends and family and why our biggest holidays are holidays that bring them all together. But our friends and family only fulfills so much of our need for connections to others. I guess that's where that thing called love (romantic) comes into play. We all desire it and I'd might argue that we all need it. So no one WANTS to be single... instead, what I believe people really mean is that they haven't found a person who fulfills that need like it needs to be fulfilled. That person who's weirdness matches their own weirdness. That person that convinces them not being single with them is better than being single.

As a member of the "singles club", to be fair, I can't go in on this without addressing why I'M single. I've been asked this question countless times by countless people. Admittedly, at one point in time I asked myself this very same question and convinced myself that just maybe I'm just not attractive enough to attract guys, maybe I'm too skinny, too dark skinned, too natural, too tall, too smart.. lol... (We women tend to have our own mean girl in the back of our heads whispering such awful things)... but no, my numerous first dates within this past year dispels all the things My Mean Girl whispers to me (And the fact too many people ask if I'm a model to believe that to be true, lol). So I really had to ask myself... considering the number of first dates I've gone on.... WHY AM I still single??

Am I just content being single? Oh I'm perfect happy being single... as in I am a happy female that is single, there's always more room for more happiness.

Do I want to be single? Um. No. I would love to have that fulfilling connection with someone.

My problem isn't that I'm too comfortable being single or prefer to be single. I'm actually quite ready to not be single. I'm a movie buff and I tired of trying to figure out which friend I need to call and convince to go to the movies with me. I'm also sick of putting together the IKEA furniture in my house and lugging my groceries up the stairs. Although, it's is a money saver come Christmas and February... but my problem, I suppose, is the Men I've been meeting.

I recently went on a twitter tirade not too long ago, comparing men to books. See, I'm avid reader and I can read a 1000-pg book in 1-2 days if I had the time and wanted to. However, despite my love for books, I find that I cannot pick up a book and read it the second time. The characters are all the same, the plots are the same, the ending... the same. I will even put down a book if the story resembles other stories I've read previously. Boring! So yeah, it seems to be the same with Men. I'm BORED with my options... Well more accurately, my options are BORING. I'm bored with what I've seen and what has approached me. They have all been a variation of some story I already dated, or seen my friends date, and I'm just not interested. Of course I'm sure many would say, you can't judge a book by its cover, that I should put my pre-judgements on the shelf and try to get to know some of these Men. I do go against my better judgement a lot of the time and do exactly that and so far I haven't been proven wrong, thus my numerous first dates. I suppose I'm single because I'm waiting for the Pulitzer prize winning novel to land in my lap. Unfortunately I believe this city is full of awful authors. Maybe when if I move....